No Answer Is An Answer — When A Guy Doesn’t Text Back, He’s Not Interested

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Modern dating and texting go hand in hand, but for some reason, the unanswered text still seems an all too common mystery. If you feel particularly clueless about the topic, here’s how to crack the code: no answer is indeed an answer — he’s just not interested.

1. GUYS WHO ARE ACTUALLY INTERESTED WILL MAKE TIME FOR YOU.
Everyone’s busy AF, but if a guy actually cares, he’ll do whatever it takes to be in your life. That means he won’t leave you hanging on a text. He’ll text back because he actually wants to talk to you. Seeing your name light up his phone will make him happy, not annoyed, and he’ll be more than happy to shoot over a few words to keep the conversation going.

2. TEXTING SOMEONE BACK TAKES LESS THAN A MINUTE.
Some guys act like texting is such a huge hassle and asking too much, but look at the reality of that thought process. Your phone alerts you when you get a message and that notification doesn’t go away until you check the message. Even if he doesn’t have time at the moment, it’s not like he can just forget that red bubble staring him in the face. When he does open the message, texting back usually takes less than a minute. Would any guys like to explain once again how that’s asking too much?

3. YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN MIXED SIGNALS.
If you have to constantly decipher his texts or lack thereof to figure out if he likes you then he’s just not worth it. If he’s not on his texting game with you, take the loss and move on. Don’t keep going after a guy who’s clearly not feeling it. Your heart might want something to happen, but listen to your head and don’t be desperate. Deep down, you know the meaning of an unanswered message.

4. NO GUY SHOULD EVER LEAVE YOU WAITING BY THE PHONE.
You have a life and you’re not going to put if off for some guy. If a guy expects you to wait around for whenever he feels like texting you back, he needs to get off his high horse and realize that your world doesn’t revolve around him. Men aren’t God’s gift to women. If he leaves you waiting around to hear from him, send him a message of your own and just move on.

5. A MAN WHO REALLY LIKES YOU WILL BE HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU.
He’ll also be more than happy to text back. He won’t see texting as something he has to do but something he actually wants to do. He’s interested in you and that’s why he wants to keep the relationship flowing. If he doesn’t bother sending a reply, he’s already stopped that flow and the “relationship” is headed straight to nowhere.

6. THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A RANDOM OCCURRENCE AND A HABIT.
If he misses a message or forgets to text back one time, it’s no big deal, but if he’s constantly leaving you waiting on a reply for days at a time, it’s pretty damn clear he’s not interested. He’s not answering (or at least not answering quickly enough) because you’re not on his mind. He texts you when it’s convenient for him, which is most likely when he’s horny or bored.

7. IF HE WANTS A RELATIONSHIP, HE’LL MAKE AN EFFORT.
If he’s not willing to do the work or put in the time, it means that you’re just not important to him. Do you really want to go after a guy who doesn’t see you as a priority in his life? If you’re doing all the work and he never even meets you in the middle, you’re just going to end up exhausted and unsatisfied. Remember — guys who have a real interest know how to make an effort.

8. GUYS AREN’T THE BEST AT EXPRESSING THEIR FEELINGS.
So when a guy isn’t texting back consistently, he’s trying to give you a clue. Sure, it would be nice if he had a little more respect for you and just told you openly that he’s not that into you, but alas, that seems to be asking too much. So a lot of guys do what they do best — avoid the problem and hope it will eventually go away when you get the hint.

9. SOMETIMES TEXTING HABITS ARE A GUY’S WAY OF DEFINING THE RELATIONSHIP.
A guy who texts back on the reg is interested. A guy who only texts you last minute when he’s horny is only interested in being your hookup buddy. A guy who doesn’t text back until you repeatedly hit him up has no interest at all — he’s just trying to get you off his back. If he never texts back then that silent treatment is your slap in the face to move the hell on.

10. IF HE’S NOT PURSUING YOU, IT’S TIME TO STOP PURSUING HIM.
Guys who are interested text back. Guys who aren’t don’t. Don’t bother trying to change his mind. You need to have the confidence to realize that if a guy doesn’t see how great you are, it’s his loss. Let go of him and move on to a guy who will be excited to have you in his life. You can’t fight for a guy who’s not fighting for you. At the end of the day, you just have to accept that no message is a message — that’s his way of telling you he’s just not interested.

By Kelsey Dykstra for Bolde

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