Until A Guy Locks Me Down, I’m Keeping My Options Open

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I’ve spent the past decade of my life being loyal AF when I’m dating a guy — now things have changed. I never used to believe in focusing on more than one guy at a time, but I’ve been screwed over one too many times and I’m tired of playing by the same old rules. Until a guy locks the relationship down and officially makes me his girlfriend, I’m free to do whatever the hell I want.

1. IT’S MY TURN TO BE SELFISH.
I’m sick of investing my energy in guys who think it’s perfectly acceptable to continue to browse Tinder and date other women when everything between us seems to be going great. This mentality isn’t going to change — in fact, it seems to have become the norm — so I’m going to allow myself the same luxury and keep my options open until a guy finally steps up to the plate in a real way with me.

2. I’M SICK OF WASTING MY TIME.
It’s an all too common feeling to be strung along by a guy who wasn’t really in it for real relationship reasons and I refuse to continue this viscous cycle. My time is valuable and I won’t be investing it in the same way that I have been unless a guy makes me a priority in his life. I won’t sit on the bench or in a rotation of other women anymore — screw that.

3. HE NEEDS TO BE WORTH IT.
The right guy for me is someone who values relationships and holds that beginning stage in high regard — and I haven’t met him yet. The right guy won’t let me get away easily; he’ll fight and make real effort to take the number one spot in my life. He won’t shy away from relationship labels or progressing in that direction. I’m looking for a grown man who knows what he wants and I won’t accept anything less.

4. THERE COULD REALLY BE SOMETHING TO THIS LOGIC.
If I continue to keep my options open, perhaps it’ll light a fire under the asses of these lazy guys who can’t get their act together to start something truly meaningful. Maybe I’ve had it wrong all along and I need to raise my expectations to weed the idiots out sooner.

5. I WANT TO END UP WITH THE GUY WHO ACTUALLY GIVES A DAMN AND SHOWS IT.
I deserve to explore my options as well so that I can find the best guy for me. I’m so used to focusing on one guy at a time that I get caught up in my emotions and always end up getting hurt or left baffled by yet another disappointment — enough is enough. I’m not locking myself into just one guy until I come across one who gives a real and genuine crap
about me and wants to be with me without hesitation.

6. IF HE LETS ME GET AWAY, IT’S HIS OWN DAMN FAULT.
It’s time for these guys to start working and earning their way into my life — I’m completely over this lazy crap I keep getting. If I’m dating a guy and he isn’t making me feel amazing, I’ll continue to look for the unicorn who will. I’m not settling on mediocre and half-assed garbage anymore.

7. NO ONE IS LOYAL ANYMORE IN THE BEGINNING.
It’s pretty rare these days that modern relationships start off sweetly and innocently. Almost always, guys have someone else in the rotation (women do it too, but definitely not as frequently). I’ve been loyal long enough and I’m sick of getting hurt, so I’m taking control of the situation by living by the same logic.

8. I DESERVE THE SAME CHANCES AT FINDING MY FOREVER.
It’s not that I won’t be loyal to the right guy for me who’s actually on the same page in wanting a real relationship — but until that day comes, I deserve to have my heart open to any guy who might rise to the occasion. I’m sick of being loyal right off the bat for guys who totally don’t deserve it, and for that reason, until a guy locks me down, I’m keeping my dating options open.

By Andrea Wesley for Bolde

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