Don’t Settle Until You Find Someone Who Doesn’t Make You Feel Like You’re ‘Too Much’ Or ‘Not Enough’

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Finding someone who is compatible with you and reciprocates all the same feelings you have is almost like a ‘mission impossible’. But it does happen. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. I’ve seen it with my neighbors, with my friends, with my relatives. Finding ‘The One’ is definitely possible, and it happens every single day.

I can’t guarantee when it will happen to me or you. But I can tell you not to settle, especially when you’re simply tired of dating or being alone. Because being single, though lonely sometimes (I would be lying if I say it isn’t), gives you the luxury of doing anything you want, compromising with nobody, and being your own best friend. It is definitely better than being in a miserable or an ‘almost’ relationship.

So, whenever you feel sad about your single life, remember that you are not obligated to settle, ever.

Don’t settle if the idea of being with them doesn’t make you happy… like, truly happy.

Don’t settle if the only reason is so you can have someone to go out with.

Don’t settle for a smooth-talker who promises you dreamy ideas but hasn’t proven any with action.

Don’t settle if you have to play games every single day to keep them around.

Don’t settle if all you have is adrenaline from chasing and guesswork.

Don’t settle if you can’t be 100% yourself around them.

Don’t settle if you feel like you’re the only one who is trying to make it work.

Don’t settle with anyone who doesn’t pursue you.

Don’t settle if you always come up with an excuse for their behavior, or lack thereof.

Don’t settle if every time you think of them it makes you cry more often than smile.

Don’t settle if you’re the one who always makes the plan to be together.

Don’t settle with someone who doesn’t make you feel important.

Don’t settle with someone if it doesn’t feel right. Trust your intuition.

Don’t settle if you’re the one who always texts or calls first.

Don’t settle if they don’t ask questions or show effort to get to know you better.

Don’t settle if your core values are very much different from theirs.

Don’t settle with someone who makes you doubt your good intentions.

Don’t settle with someone who doesn’t value you for being your authentic you.

Don’t settle if you feel like you’re the only one who always compromises to keep a relationship.

Don’t settle and give them relationship benefits when they haven’t done anything to earn the right to be in a relationship with you.

Don’t settle until you find someone who doesn’t make you feel like you’re ‘too much’ or ‘not enough.’

I get it, nobody really wants to be alone. Nobody wants to feel like they’re the last one left behind. Everyone wants someone who ‘gets’ them. I’m still hopeful that there is someone for everyone.

There is someone out there who feels the same way you do, someone who reciprocates the same feelings you have. It might not happen at the timeline that we want it to happen, but it will. But we can’t force it. Love and healthy relationship can’t be forced.

The only thing in your power is to be your best self. You should learn to embrace your strengths and your flaws and build a life you enjoy. The right person will not make you happy. Don’t buy into that illusion. They will make you happier. So, get out there and pursue your dreams. Live your life to the fullest every day and enjoy your single life.

Don’t stress out about finding a relationship. But be ready for it when the right person finally finds you. Don’t be sad if you don’t meet them tomorrow, next month or even next year. You should think of each day as another day closer for you to finally meet them. Life is full of surprises. Who knows, you might run into them in the least expected way, and the rest will be, well, history.

By Nui Kara for ThoughtCatalog

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