Maybe You’re Single Because You’re Overqualified For Love

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t’s easy to get down on yourself if you’ve been single for what seems like eternity, but you shouldn’t blame yourself or let it get it you down. There’s nothing wrong with you and you’re more than deserving of having a great guy in your life even if it hasn’t happened yet. Sometimes, the reason you’re single and finding love seems much harder for you is simply because you’re overqualified for it.

1. YOU’VE GOT YOUR CRAP TOGETHER AND YOU’RE KILLING IT IN LIFE.
You’ve got all of your ducks in a row, which is no easy task as an adult, especially one who is single, so you technically don’t need anyone else to help you with the tough things in life — you handle it yourself. This makes it tough for a guy to come in because guys like to feel wanted and needed and when you’ve got your life dialed in without a guy’s help, it comes across as intimidating. Fortunately, it’s only intimidating to the guys who aren’t strong enough for you in the first place.

2. YOU HAVE HIGHER STANDARDS BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU DESERVE IT.
You have high expectations for your potential partner. You’ve been there and done that with enough idiot guys to know that you’re waiting for someone truly amazing who’s worth letting into the life you’re killing it in. You know exactly what you have to offer and therefore, you’re pickier about who you offer it to.

3. YOU’RE COMPLETELY OVER MINDLESS HOOKUPS.
You couldn’t care less about the hookup culture mentality which means you date a lot less than normal because you’re completely over dating guys who just want to have sex and not make a real investment in you. Most singles these days are focusing on quantity over quality, but you know better than to buy into the BS.

4. IT’S HARDER TO FIND A GUY WHO’S ON YOUR LEVEL.
Being overqualified means that you’re a strong and independent woman capable of doing everything you need to in life by your own two hands and unfortunately, finding a guy that matches your hustle is a harder task to conquer. It might be frustrating at times, wondering why you’re not wifed up when you’re clearly amazing, but it’s because guys these days just don’t have the same levels of ambition they used to. It’s not your fault.

5. YOU WON’T DATE JUST FOR THE SAKE OF DATING ANYMORE.
You’re not so desperate for love that you’re out chasing it constantly and filling up your Pinterest boards with future wedding plans when you don’t even have a groom. You only date a guy if he seems to be truly worth it — and most of the time, you’re out of his league and he can’t get his act together enough to keep you in his life. Your relationship failures aren’t symptomatic of you not being good enough, it’s because you’re usually too good for the jerks you’re met with.

6. YOUR LIFE IS ALREADY AMAZING AS IT IS.
When you truly think about it, not only are you self-sufficient and not in any desperate need for a partner but you’re also completely happy with how your life is just as it is right now. You’ve got a great job, a place to call home, great friends and a long list of things you do for yourself to further your own happiness.

7. YOU’RE FOCUSING ON OTHER THINGS IN THE MEANTIME.
In the absence of love, you have so much other stuff going on in your life that sometimes you completely forget that you’re single at all. When you’re too busy focusing on yourself, your status goes up because you’re not needy about having love in your life — it’s just a bonus. For now, you’re happy concentrating on what you have.

8. A GUY CAN’T COMPLETE YOU WHEN YOU’RE ALREADY WHOLE.
You’re overqualified because you’re not looking for a guy to complete with you — you’re a whole human all on your own. When guys notice that you’re marching to your own beat, only the truly strong and capable guys will attempt to interrupt your rhythm to get your attention — players and guys who are slacking don’t have the balls to step up to the plate.

9. YOU’RE NOT LOOKING FOR HANDOUTS, YOU’RE LOOKING FOR REAL LOVE.
You don’t need a guy in your life to pay your bills or get all of the things you want because you go out there and get it yourself like a boss woman should. It’s harder for guys to appreciate this because they usually think that throwing some money around is all they need to impress a woman, but not you. You pay your own way — you’ll take love instead.

10. YOU KNOW YOUR WORTH AND YOU WON’T SETTLE.
You know exactly what you have to offer and you won’t be giving it to just anyone. People might say your standards are too high or that you’re being too picky, but when you’ve got everything going for yourself, you have every right to be choosy about who you commit your time and heart to. The next time you feel down about yourself for being single, remember this — you’re not single because you’re not a catch, it’s simply because you’re overqualified for love.

By Andrea Wesley for Bolde

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