A girl, or a lady?
There is a substantial difference between dating a girl and dating a lady. It isn’t just about how old she is. Some girls can grow old without ever really growing up. And some women are just natural ladies even at young ages. Age shouldn’t really matter in this discussion. The distinction between a girl and lady can’t be measured by numbers; the distinction is made with character, personality, philosophy, and demeanor. Emotional maturity is absolutely integral in being able to make a relationship work. You could both be deeply in love with one another; but it takes emotional maturity to be able to take that love and actually turn it into something special and sustainable. Just because you’re in love doesn’t automatically mean that you will be able to make that love work. You both need to be mature about it. And that’s why you need to be dating a lady a opposed to a mere girl.
There are substantial fundamental differences between a lady and a girl. You just have to know what things to look for so that you can make that distinction. So how are you supposed to tell if the person you’re in a relationship is actually a girl or a lady? Well, here are some things to really think about.
1- A girl is always going to want to air her laundry out in public whether dirty or not. But a lady is always going to respect the idea of discretion and intimacy in a relationship. A lady is always going to try to keep the private things where they should be within a relationship.
2- A girl is always going to count on her man to provide for her on a financial and physiological capacity. But a lady only has to rely on herself to get by in life. A real lady understands that she has to earn the things she wants most in the world.
3- A girl is always going to feel insecure and threatened whenever you start interacting with other women. However, a lady is always going to be secure enough about her place in your relationship to actually be okay with you interacting with other women. She respects you enough to allow you to have a life beyond just the two of you.
4- A girl is always going to obsess over how she looks more than how she acts. A lady understands that character is everything and it should always come before one’s physical attributes. She believes it’s more important to the beautiful on the inside.
5- A girl is always going to chase after her men with recklessness and desperation. A lady is always going to focus on herself and she will just wait for the men to line up after her. She isn’t going to desperately pursue anyone just because she’s afraid of being single.
6- A girl is always going to be content with just being someone’s girlfriend. She likes the novelty of being in a relationship; but she isn’t really all that crazy about the relationship itself. A lady knows her worth and she would never settle for just anyone. She wants to be in a real relationship with a reliable partner who she can always trust.
7- A girl is always going to demand for your attention. She will do anything to get people to notice her. A lady won’t always be boisterous, but she is always going to be able to demand your full attention when you’re interacting with one another.
8- A girl is always going to adjust and change who she is in an effort to try and win over a guy. But a lady is always going to focus on putting forth the best version of herself. She will never try to be anyone she’s not comfortable with being.
9- A girl is always going to be fond of talking and gossiping about other people. She thrives off the dramatic narratives that surround the lives of other people. A lady understands that only small minds talk about other people; great minds talk about ideas.
10- A girl is always going to make her relationship the center of her life. She isn’t going to have a life beyond her and her boyfriend. A lady never disregards or undermines her individuality. She still maintains a healthy and active lifestyle as an individual outside of her relationship.
11- A girl is always going to grow attracted to men who are bad for her. She is the kind of girl who thinks that she can change men with her love. A lady understands that she doesn’t have to settle with just anyone for the sake of being in a relationship. If she isn’t ready to fall in love with someone, then she won’t.
12- A girl is always going to obsess over shallow pop culture and basic media. A lady is a girl who reads, studies, and thinks. She is a girl who is cultured and understands that there are layers to everything in this world.
What A Real Woman Brings To A Relationship
She has high expectations for you, because she has them for herself. She wouldn’t ask something of you that she wasn’t ready to do, and though she knows that a good relationship means being able to support each other, she knows that doesn’t just go one way. There may be times when she needs your help, but it’s more important to her that you know that you could ask for the same, anytime. She wants to be the shoulder you can cry on, half of the team, and bring her own independence to be able to create something stronger between you. She doesn’t expect everything to be handed to her, because she knows everything will be better if it’s built by two.
She does love to be taken out, wined and dined, brought to a favorite movie. But she wants to do the same for you. She wants to say “No, I’ve got this” when you’re reaching for your wallet, and to not let you look at the bill. She wants to surprise you by cooking dinner at home, sure, but she also wants to surprise you by taking you out to an amazing one. She doesn’t believe in the outdated gender norms of “the man always pays,” or “the woman always takes care of the home,” because she knows that there is joy in doing both. She’s not afraid of being in the kitchen because she knows that we don’t have to reject every stereotype, but she’s not afraid to break them, either.
It makes her happy to treat you because that’s what life’s about, and only children get taken care of 100 percent of the time. She knows it’s about give and take.
And when it comes to communication, she knows it’s key, but she also doesn’t expect anyone to be “on” 100 percent of the time. If you’re having a night out with the guys, she doesn’t expect that you’ll text her every minute, and she doesn’t get jealous because she sees your female coworker writing on your Facebook wall. She has enough confidence in herself, and in the relationship, to know that what you have doesn’t need to be reassured and confirmed every minute of every day. It’s okay to take a breather every now and again, because then you’ll have something to talk about when you see each other next.
Besides, she knows that some of the best communication is spontaneous. Picking up your phone in the morning to a lovely text, or a dirty picture, or something totally unexpected is part of what makes life romantic. Not feeling like your communication has to be on a schedule is part of that, and she doesn’t expect anyone to check in with her on a mandated basis. She’s doing fine, and you don’t have to worry about her.
Because when she needs you, she’ll ask. She’s not afraid of looking weak, because she knows that everyone needs help sometimes, and nothing about that makes you a weak or fragile person. The whole point of being in love is to be on a team, and to not have to go through everything alone. And when she’s feeling low, she trusts that you’ll be there to support her, or just to listen, because she would do the same for you. Your support is what makes her strong, what allows her to pursue her independence, and what gives that confidence. She’s not afraid of seeming “needy,” because she knows that when you love someone, you need them. In the best way possible.
A real woman brings this knowledge to her relationships because she doesn’t want one built on what he can buy, or how often he texts her to check in. She wants one built on equality and love, like only two real adults can actually have.