When you think about making a guy fall for you so hard that he can’t live without you, you might think that it all comes down to sex — isn’t the Big O the way to his heart? Well, not really. The truth is, there are plenty of other ways to keep him coming back for more. Here are just a few of them:
1. HOLD BACK A BIT.When last did you fall for someone who spilled out their entire life story during a coffee date? There’s a reason why you should hold back a bit when dating someone new — you give the mystery a chance to build. Be a bit of a puzzle that he has to work out instead of an open book that he can read in an hour and he’ll have a reason to come back. Follow the same rule when it comes to sex. Although it might feel old-fashioned to wait to get undressed, just think of how hooked on you he’ll be when you look sexy AF and he knows that he can’t have you yet.
2. LET HIM PEEL BACK HIS LAYERS. Everyone needs a special someone with whom they can be honest and open about their feelings about anything without being judged for it. When a guy can talk to you about anything and you allow him to be himself, this is addictive, especially because he’ll only be able to get such full support from you. Sure, he can laugh and be silly with his friends as much as he does with you, but he’s not going to open up to them in the locker room. By giving him what no one else does, he’ll be coming back for more.
3. ACT LIKE A PRIZE — IT’S THE GATEWAY DRUG TO HIS LOVE. Guys want the challenge of pursuing you. If you’re too available and show you’re too interested in him too soon, this is an anti-climax. It would be like giving him all the cheats to his favorite Xbox game. Where’s the fun in that? Carry yourself in such a way that you know your worth and you know he has to work for it, and he’ll rise to the occasion.
4. GET SOME DOPAMINE. If you are always suggesting the same coffee or dinner dates, you risk boring him. It’s like watching the same movie a hundred times — you know exactly what’s going to happen. Yawn. Do something a little different — maybe try an adventure sport together or go on a road trip to a place you both have yet to see. This won’t only give you new stuff to talk about, but exciting new experiences release dopamine in the brain. This chemical is responsible for lust and desire.
5. MAKE HIM MISS YOU. It’s not enough to have lots of powerful, memorable dates with a guy, though. You have to let him miss you. Once he suffers withdrawals from you, that’s when he’ll realize just how much he wants to be with you. If you’re always in his space, whether in RL or via text, you don’t give him a chance to reach that understanding on his own.
6. GET PASSIONATE OUTSIDE OF THE BEDROOM. What can cause a guy to lose interest is if you were a fun and carefree woman but then changed as the relationship progressed, perhaps losing your spark or becoming clingy. Be the person you are from date one and always bring your passion to the table. Whatever it is that makes your eyes sparkle is what you need to keep refueling because this is what makes you so sexy to men. Your guy will want to be around you when you’re chasing your fire because it’s so damn intoxicating.
7. SHOW HIM YOUR VULNERABLE SIDE. Once you get to know a guy, you should not only allow him to be real with you but you should also peel back your layers. The reason comes down to biology. When men feel the need to protect you and keep you safe, this triggers their instinct to take care of you. In other words: love! It feels so good to lie in your BF’s arms and open up to him emotionally, and he’ll be feeling the same warmth and fuzziness. Of course, he might be too manly to admit it.
Are You Addicted To Your Partner? Here Are 16 Ways to Tell
When We Fall In Love, Everything Else Becomes Hazy. We Become Intoxicated. We Want To Soak Up Every Bit Of Our Partner’s Being.
As Dr. Seuss put it, “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
Unfortunately, there is a dark side to this dynamic. What begins as a healthy sense of adoration can turn to infatuation, obsession, and even addiction. The problems begin when we abandon our own sense of self and personal well-being in favor of our relationship.
How do we know when we’re crossing the line?
Here Are Sixteen Signs You May Be Forming An Unhealthy Addiction To Your Partner:
1. Your work, friendships, and family connections have suffered as a result of your relationship.
2. You set healthy boundaries with your partner, and you do so with every intention of keeping them. However, you always end up breaking them in the end.
3. The thought of losing your partner induces feelings of panic or grief. You honestly don’t know what you would do if they were to end the relationship.
4. You have abandoned hobbies and interests that used to make you happy. You only remain active in activities if you can engage in them together as a couple.
5. You find yourself starting fights with your significant other for no real reason. This usually happens when you are feeling ignored or insecure.
6. You feel offended when your partner is excited about anything that does not include you – for example, an upcoming marathon they are running in or a friend’s bachelor/bachelorette party they plan to attend. How dare they enjoy it if you can’t be there?
7. You keep score when it comes to attention and romantic gestures. You often wonder – and worry – which of you loves the other more.
8. You dress to please your partner, rather than to reflect your own mood and sense of personal style. If he doesn’t approve of your beloved new dress, it has got to go.
9. You no longer get excited about plans with friends or family if they do not involve your significant other. You find yourself bored when they’re not around.
10. You pretend to be interested in things you are not in order to spend more time with your partner.
11. You spend money you do not have on your relationship. This includes vacations, gifts, and even simple nights out. You may even find yourself in debt from these behaviors.
12. Your public displays of affection make other people feel uncomfortable.
13. You feel anxious or empty when you are separated from your significant other. You can no longer bear to spend time alone.
14. You insist on bringing your significant other to places you know they are not welcome, such as a special guy’s night out or girlfriend getaway.
15. You often engage in sexual activity with your partner during inappropriate times and/or in inappropriate places.
16. You choose to spend time with your partner when you should be attending to personal or professional responsibilities. For example, you find yourself snuggled up on the couch with them when you ought to be editing your term paper or attending your grandmother’s birthday party.
“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”
― Neil Gaiman,