OK, so he said he wanted to make plans this weekend. It’s Friday, you haven’t heard anything from him, but you don’t want to make plans and then have him call. You text him, “Hey, did you still want to get together and do something tonight?” An hour goes by, nothing. What do you do?
Casual double text? Accidental text? Call him? Stop what you’re doing. Put the phone down. No, really. Put it down. I’ll tell you what to do ladies: Nothing. Not a thing.
First of all, this man should be coming after you. If this man is into you, then trust me, he will get a hold of you. If a guy really likes you, is super excited about hanging out with you, has bragged to all of his friends about you and treats you well, guess what? That guy is going to text you to ask you out again, or just to see how your day was. Chivalry is not dead.
If a guy isn’t texting you back, do not — I repeat, do not — freak out and think of 100 possible things he could be doing right now. Don’t wonder who he’s with, why he doesn’t want to answer you, etc. These mind games are anxiety-inducing, and they are a waste of your time.
He’s probably not answering you because he fell asleep on his Xbox controller with his hand in a bag of Doritos again. It really isn’t as serious as you think (most of the time). And if the man is getting it on with someone else and that’s the reason he’s not answering you, then get out of here. Boy, bye.
Why would you want a man like that? You don’t. This is a big world, and sometimes it’s hard to see the endless possibilities it offers when you’re so wrapped up in a person. I promise you, there will be other men. There are plenty of men out there who are willing to treat you right and answer a damn text every once in a while.
If this is the beginning of a new thing, and you’re not sure what the “terms” are, then the same rules apply. Even if you guys are just getting to know each other and hanging out, if he has interest in you, he should be going after you.
Don’t play games. They’re dumb and will get you nowhere. Don’t wait three hours to text him back just because he took three hours to answer you. That is also dumb. Be straightforward about what you want, and you are more likely to get it than if you beat around the bush.
It also drives a man crazy (in a good way) when he has to chase a woman. Men always want what they can’t have. The more unavailable you seem, the more desirable you are to them. Ladies, you don’t need to be throwing yourself at guys. Don’t make it easy for them. Make them work for it, as they should.
Unfortunately for me, I had to learn this by living through it myself. So trust me when I say if a guy wants you, he’ll come after you. He’s going to be pull out all the stops for you because he wants to show you his best side in hopes that maybe, if he’s lucky, he will be good enough for you.
Ladies, everyone deserves to meet a guy who is going to pull out all the stops for her. Don’t try to make excuses for him. Trust me, I know. I convinced myself he just wasn’t good at texting, wasn’t into romantic gestures or just had a really busy lifestyle. But the truth is, if a guy wants something or wants to spend time with someone, he will make time for it in his life regardless of how busy he is.
Usually, what you see is what you get. It really is that simple. If you have a sketchy feeling about a guy, ditch him. Stop putting his feelings above your own. Stop thinking about his body and his pleasure, and think about your own.
If he wants you, he’ll come and get you. And if he doesn’t, then drop him. Because in the end, you don’t want to be stuck with an assh*le who doesn’t treat you as his number one. You want a significant other you can communicate with, in a relationship rooted in mutual respect. F*ckboys will only get you so far.
Find someone who treats you the way you deserve and answers your freaking texts. Remember: If he’s not texting you back, do nothing. Personally, I say don’t even text him in the first place. Make the boys come to you, girlfriend.